There’s something in 14 Peaks that calls out to me.

Nims speaks out the very things we once harboured in our hearts, the very things we held close to heart and pursued like crazy because we believed ——— but afterwards lost them to the daily grinds

And coincidentally, I went back to writing my column yesterday. The piece of writing is slated for Christmas and the idea of light and love came up. My Santa is Mr Ng, who made me see the light each time I went to see him.

I started writing and re-reading just two posts —— every time after I visited, I would write down faithfully the contents of the the visit : what we discussed and exchanged ——- I cried so hard. The nuggets of truth and wisdom I fetched out from then, those visits stand true today. And they are still useful for me. I reconnected with the truths he shared with me and I saw how much I was appreciated as a soul. He taught me how to acknowledge and recognize my self, how to be gentle with myself——-always, before I knew

I miss my teacher and is calling out for him from the depths of my heart.

Then I watched 14 Peaks

The combination worked I guess.

I went back to 2016. When I had the idea of getting Nic to be a Friend of Michelin. And boom, I got to him.

How is that even possible? There is every reason it would be impossible.

In 100 years the red book has been in existence, there is no Friend of Michelin.

https://guide.michelin.com/en/article/news-and-views/michelin-unveils-its-first-friend-of-michelin

https://guide.michelin.com/hk/zh_HK/article/news-and-views/michelin-unveils-its-first-friend-of-michelin

Seeing him on stage carrying out and expressing my belief—- that Food is made good with friends and in connection—— is impossible to describe.

The feeling you carry in the heart area is full and warm—— when you make the impossible possible.

No word can do justice to that feeling.

No amount of money too.

I went to bed. And got out of it in a matter of minutes .

I cut the quote on an upcoming video. If that could make the project possible, I will do it. The joy of making a video is impossible to describe too because that is what makes me come alive.

So I emailed the client with an adjusted quote and went back to bed.

And this morning, this morning when I woke and lay in bed, trying to be still. Beautiful thoughts and feelings came to me.

Those moments sitting beside the camera the frame, lights shining on the subject in front of me. The subject revealing thoughts emotions true to him and me feeling them—— because, with age, how different can we be. We run similar programs emotions albeit in different places and different points in life. We connect in the suffering that pain we all had a chance to experience

He or she might be talking about him or her but what I hear is about me. The moments in between —- working with what was released in real time, takes things out of me. It is work in process and expression at its best

That seat, right opposite the subject. Here is where and when I come alive . I live for these.

Why did I give it away so easily ?

The feeling sitting in that spot. I can’t wait to be back.

To use my gift and experience, to share light love hope warmth and delivering it my style.

This is my mission my purpose and the reason of my existence my being. It is why I am wired this way why I feel this way why I have experienced what I have —— all these were in preparation for me to do the work I am here for.

This is the first time I see things this way—— like a puzzle in place. A breakthrough and light of sorts—- i m wired this way because I need my strengths and weaknesses to do the work I do

And seeing this made me appreciate my experiences more.

I thanked my experiences once more and release all that do not serve me any longer —— out of my energy field , and I do so with much ease and grace, lovingly tenderly and I intend for them to move out at a speed fastest possible for my comfort and grounding

But more than release, I know for sure I would be able to use them in my work.

Mr Ng said to me: “you have always shared with me what other people say, what about you? What is your story? I want to hear your story. You should be in the frame.”

He saw the beauty of my beingness when I did not.

The reason and beauty of my being is to express. And when I do not do that, I could not come alive.

These two or three years when I left what I did professionally, a part of me stopped.

Where did you go —— I asked myself . And thank you for coming back. In fact, welcome back TPY——- I heard me say.

The feeling is the same that I felt seeing Nic on stage. The impossible had happened in a way to fetch me back.

And I could see now, how my guardian angels how the creator the source or god, has always been with me and in me———or else, how could I be here today saying this. At this time.

This time, it is the perfect time. Anything earlier or later would not have been.

And the magic in the essential oils —— Believe. And the affirmation I said every morning Michael Beckwith shared . He said to do it for a month and see what happens.

“I am available to more good than I have ever imagined . Let me co create a way of life with god that holds the insights and revelations the wisdom and intelligence that flows with time.”

I ask for support and all the resources on all levels to propel me in this direction of sharing my own light to the world. And it would be for the purpose of letting others see their own light and wonder.

It is Mr Ng’s greatest gift to me. He let me see the beauty of my light being . Always has been and will never go away.

And receiving that make me want to tend to this light I am born with privileged to bear and to share it outwards. To light another being.

Watching Korean travelogue “The Hungry and the Hairy” brought to mind that I once believed I was made for big things. I went to the best schools , had great results, was always ‘seen’ and ‘heard’. I made a name for myself. (Probably that was why I was so drawn to my ex boss SH, who also made dreams come true. ) But I gave up being big and decided to hide myself in small after Dad left us after Mom died. I hid my talents my wishes my purpose my mission along with those incidents. I stopped living me even if I m alive . Recently I had the feeling that I stopped myself when I left my last designation——- but now I realized I stopped myself even earlier.

No one else but me. I stopped myself from living my truth.

And I realized also, rather, I made the decision to not fall into another cycle of unhappiness with bf. I m no longer going to invest myself being upset. Been there done that. Enough is enough is enough.

I m going to live life devoted to protecting and sharing my light.

Is it any coincidence I woke up to these on 12/12?