Tag: transformation

Inspirations From A Run (XIX)

Inspirations From A Run (XIX)

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My intention for today is to anchor my power in my body, being, soul

The last week has been one that is “filled with content “ whether in the area of work, family life or in my own

At work, I kind of had the opportunity to host a big chef event and connected back with partners and people whom I had worked with closely previously in my last role

Then there were new friends

There were some folks who had brushes, and out of these, the meeting brought closure, for one or two others, the closure couldn’t be had

Oh well

On the whole it was good. I think I still enjoy the food industry. Most of all, seeing combinations and creativity in the form of ingredient pairing or how food can be- speaking to chefs- these energize me

At home, bf had a close brush at work, experiencing a separation lapse and feeling out of sorts and sent to a low

I tried to help the family tried to help, but it is clear he wants to take it his way

I thought about my role as much as I was wanting to help

But it seems- everyone has his or her own journey

And the best we can do is to stand grounded in our own power

Which brings me to the next point and today’s intention

I think to help or at least help ourselves, we have to stand grounded and in harmony in our own light and power

I had a wonderful birthday celebration with my folks, lots of friends texted me. I bathed and soaked in these blessings. And I kind of felt more at ease “coming out” as opposed to previously-keeping myself in.

It feels like I have moved and shifted somewhat to be more at ease with myself and therefore others

I m thankful and grateful for the love I have , kind thoughts from people , some not even friends but whom I have met and interviewed

And their kind wishes made me once more wonder about what it is that I have done to make them remember me?

It calls to mind me. Who is me? Like this morning when I set the intention to anchor my power – what is my power? Where is it? I asked.

And I recalled what Michelle said to me in a lunch we recently had- thank you for being you. You wear authenticity on your sleeve.

Wow

Of late in a regression with Punam my ex yoga teacher, the session helped me see or celebrate divinity – not elsewhere but within me

We often think that we are beneath divinity and that divinity is separate from us

But no.

If we can feel divinity divine beings, then what are we if we are not divine ourselves?

It makes me want to explore this side of me.

And so what is the power of me in me?

I feel like the closest thing I can find to this question is this

Simpleton, dreamy, girlish, expressive, I remember my husband was asked this question by my friends on the day of our wedding

“what attracted you to this girl”

And he said something along the lines of her being pure

I think I kept myself this way all these years and I want to keep it this way whether at work or home

I want to speak my mind and act closest to what my heart says

And wherever I am I want to use my light to bring out light and goodness- whether it be in conversations or in things I do or in others

And I think – this is my power gift and what I am here for

Thank you to the divine. Thank you to the divine in me.

I am so grateful!

Inspirations From A Run (XVIII)

Inspirations From A Run (XVIII)

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The intention today was to dwelve deep into my body to find out

And guess what? I did of course.

It is 10/10 today and I read about the energies prevailing at this time to help us kickstart the new and release the old

Death and rebirth

I read about writing down ten things at 10am or 10pm

Haha

I kind of ran through in my mind what I want

I am running for my new life

I am running towards my new life

I am running into my new life

I am running my new life

It’s amazing how words set things up

And get ‘it’ going

And what do I want in my new life?

I want no cyst no keloids

No itch .

My cheeks are rosy and brimming with healthfulness

Each and every cell in my body is happy healthy joyful peaceful

All is well there is harmony peace equilibrium

My gums are healthy and my teeth is strong

Everywhere I go I am loved respected and valued for being me

Everywhere I go I spark light I bring light I bring something meaningful to the people around me

I love my work and enjoy very successful career

People respect and honour me for the good work I do

I can afford anything and everything I want – for myself and my family.

And I thank the divine my body for giving me this opportunity

Somewhere down the run, I get the idea that in my new life, my body heals miraculously, instantly, beautifully, effortlessly automatically and I did not even have to think about it

I did not have to look outside at all but just go inwards in any time of need – just so because

The body takes care of me and wants me to be well!

And at that moment I thought – in fact this has already happened and really my body has been asking me in all ways than one to love myself – thought the keloids the cyst the feeling of fatigued and breathlessness

Even through all that my body loves me and did not desert me one bit

Shouting out to me in all these ways to look inwards

To start loving myself my body my cells back irregardless of what is going on

Not just wanting a o get rid of anything but rather – accept it and understand what I did to bring myself here

Somewhere in the run I get the idea that each time I scratched myself and the keloids, I am chasing trauma to the area and giving it all the attention of inflammation causing pain and hurt to myself

And at this point I understand that not just at this time, I must have caused pain and hurt to myself in the past

And really my memory just went back in a bid to find out what I did – to cause myself pain and hurt and trauma

And the pain of it was exactly the pain I felt when the keloids were swollen and inflammed

The sharp pain that pricks and sends out fear

This I am experiencing now I have felt it before

And – I asked myself: so do I still want this? Do I still want to continue experiencing this pain?

No of course not so let’s stop scratching

But more so, the inflammed keloids really want me to see what I have done to myself on the past- that was not resolved

And that begs resolution release letting go!

And I tell myself- to breathe into the past and give it space to accept it

I think this is such a powerful practice and act .

To even have the chance to do this- for myself – I am immensely thankful.

And looking at the intention I set before running, I can’t be thankful enough and I am really really really blessed.

Inspirations From A Run (XVIII)

Inspirations From A Run (XVIII)

by yellownblac ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

The intention today was to dwelve deep into my body to find out

And guess what? I did of course.

It is 10/10 today and I read about the energies prevailing at this time to help us kickstart the new and release the old

Death and rebirth

I read about writing down ten things at 10am or 10pm

Haha

I kind of ran through in my mind what I want

I am running for my new life

I am running towards my new life

I am running into my new life

I am running my new life

It’s amazing how words set things up

And get ‘it’ going

And what do I want in my new life?

I want no cyst no keloids

No itch .

My cheeks are rosy and brimming with healthfulness

Each and every cell in my body is happy healthy joyful peaceful

All is well there is harmony peace equilibrium

My gums are healthy and my teeth is strong

Everywhere I go I am loved respected and valued for being me

Everywhere I go I spark light I bring light I bring something meaningful to the people around me

I love my work and enjoy very successful career

People respect and honour me for the good work I do

I can afford anything and everything I want – for myself and my family.

And I thank the divine my body for giving me this opportunity

Somewhere down the run, I get the idea that in my new life, my body heals miraculously, instantly, beautifully, effortlessly automatically and I did not even have to think about it

I did not have to look outside at all but just go inwards in any time of need – just so because

The body takes care of me and wants me to be well!

And at that moment I thought – in fact this has already happened and really my body has been asking me in all ways than one to love myself – thought the keloids the cyst the feeling of fatigued and breathlessness

Even through all that my body loves me and did not desert me one bit

Shouting out to me in all these ways to look inwards

To start loving myself my body my cells back irregardless of what is going on

Not just wanting a o get rid of anything but rather – accept it and understand what I did to bring myself here

Somewhere in the run I get the idea that each time I scratched myself and the keloids, I am chasing trauma to the area and giving it all the attention of inflammation causing pain and hurt to myself

And at this point I understand that not just at this time, I must have caused pain and hurt to myself in the past

And really my memory just went back in a bid to find out what I did – to cause myself pain and hurt and trauma

And the pain of it was exactly the pain I felt when the keloids were swollen and inflammed

The sharp pain that pricks and sends out fear

This I am experiencing now I have felt it before

And – I asked myself: so do I still want this? Do I still want to continue experiencing this pain?

No of course not so let’s stop scratching

But more so, the inflammed keloids really want me to see what I have done to myself on the past- that was not resolved

And that begs resolution release letting go!

And I tell myself- to breathe into the past and give it space to accept it

I think this is such a powerful practice and act .

To even have the chance to do this- for myself – I am immensely thankful.

And looking at the intention I set before running, I can’t be thankful enough and I am really really really blessed.

Inspirations From A Run (XVII)

Inspirations From A Run (XVII)

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If everything is energy, we do not really have to do anything on the outside

All we have to do- is change the energy of ourselves and the outside will change

Because the outside the outer world is a reflection of the inner world

So it follows that if we change the landscape in our inner world we would be already making changes to the outside

Anything else we do outside of this is extra effort which may or may not help or distort

Today I get this

And when I ran to this spot, the thing that came to mind was- surrender to the gift of nature now

I am thankful I got the chance to be here . To do this with my body. I thanked my body my cells my blood for this opportunity

And I got the idea to use the sunlight to make newness in my body in my cells . Instead of mindless chatter , I asked my eyes my ears my hormones my skin to make newness with the gift of the sun’s light

And I forgive and tell myself to flip open a new page

Like a baby again- starting out with no judgements, no preconceived ideas, with everything in harmony and in optimum perfection

The key phrase- like a baby

And I m thankful to have this inkling

And the goosebumps on the back is real

Shine, and be unstoppably bright.

Inspirations From A Run (XVI)

Inspirations From A Run (XVI)

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Somehow somewhere in the run , something in my wanted to go forward

And I understand this as – my soul having the desire to go forward

To get out of the present

More accurately, to rise.

Writing now- the idea or realization came to me that I have at one point in time, stopped myself.

And even now with the opening of this regional role, I was still asking myself or cautioning myself lots

Out of a habit of having been in duty for a while

The second important thing that came to me, was the idea that I could make new cells

While I kept my mind on healing releasing , my body showed me how she is healing me so miraculously- such as when the keloid has a burst and healed nicely

I saw John yesterday and he said there was a lot of frustration and pent up energy that needs to be moved

So in the run, somehow I came to the idea that I could ask my body to make new cells healthy happy ones just by being present and open to the gift of sunlight wind and air from nature

This morning as I walked towards the bridge, an auntie whom I saw at the fitness corner smiled to me as usual

And I loved it

I love it because she was there. And I m happy she was there. If the old folks were there – if the old folks are well

It brings me to the idea of gratitude to have the opportunity to be here and to do this

I asked teacher Stephen for his advice and he said this –

“at home it is safe and comfortable a great place to be and laz around. But inside there is a yearning to explore discover express and communicate with others. Your voice can, must be heared and seen. Your heart and mind need to a challenge and that in itself is a tool of healing and it can open many doors and paths you can’t even imagine yet.

Whatever your decision is I will support it.”

He is right about the inside which wants to explore discover express and communicate

Need I say, the run was good

And I saw green birds having fun in the sky

As if to say- don’t take it so seriously, how about approaching it with a light heart. And with the attitude of having fun as I explore?

And I have never ever had this idea. And this shows to me how much I have moved

Inspirations From A Run (XIV)

Inspirations From A Run (XIV)

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I intended the practice to be a time to open up and receive guidance for the questions I have and for the healing I need

And as usual it was awesome

Learning to make time for myself is one of the best things I can/have done for myself

To make space, just to be with myself

And I came to know how blessed I am, looking at the times I ran the same route and have nothing on my mind

I saw an article by Cedric Grolet and he says that he is creative because he is free.

I love this

I look back at the times when there is nothing else hanging on my heart and I ran

Besides thanking the divine for the opportunity, I thank myself for opening up to this opportunity

And I ask the divine to bring me people things opportunities that serve me in my highest good and to land me in a better place- one that is of healthfulness, vitality, happiness, harmony, peace, creativity, freedom

If everything is energy, we are creating with our thoughts words heart energy.

Of late, I particularly enjoy a simple qigong movement where you feel the energy between both hands and move from left to right

As I was doing it, I felt like I was adjusting my life. Purposefully moving things about in my life, whether it be the health aspect or career, family .

There is no need to fix things or speak to anyone to change anything of I can mindfully move things about, and to feel peaceful with this

And there were so many times I felt goosebumps when I spoke to my cells- let’s open up and receive healing love and light from nature now , from these gifts of nature. Be open to it, to receive. To bask in this.

Om

The soul in his eyes shine

The soul in his eyes shine

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Ang Li have such a beautiful speech as he presented the Lifetime Achievement Award to Tony Leung.

The speech here in its entirety

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=R_X7hfPjI7k

World cinema knows Tony mostly as the romantic lead from Wong Kar-wai’s intoxicating movies but little did they know the range of roles this superstar plays, from arthouse to international blockbusters. Whether it’s broad comedy, action, or serious drama, he always delivers enchanting performances and is one of the most beloved actors among Asian audiences.

He holds so many awards and honors, all of them very much deserved, because any movie can be elevated simply by his presence. Speaking from my personal experience, Tony is a director’s dream. There is something in his eyes that’s electrifying, not just his physical eyes or skill(s) but the soul that shines through them. He can say more in one look than many actors can with a full monologue. That’s a soul that can entice you to dream and imagine through him.

He’s the kind of actor who lures the best and the worst out of you, which for a director is actually the same thing. It’s hard to articulate, but it’s like your secret self, even a struggle and confusion that you’re hiding, comes to life right in front of your eyes that forces you to deal with it honestly. The deeper he dives into a role, the more he seduces you to push for more, and that takes a part of you. I can only imagine that he likes the suffering as an artist.

There was a day on set on my movie “Lust Caution” when I had a meltdown because of an emotional scene. Tony walked up to me, he touched my shoulder, whispered in my ears, “Director, we expose skin, you expose something else, you have to take care of yourself.” We always think that directors help actors, but sometimes it’s the other way around. That really gave me strength. It’s both terrifying and meaningful when someone that good and genuine embodies a hidden part of you.

His willingness to constantly share that vulnerability is what makes him so great. It appears to me he doesn’t do it for the credit. He’s like water, filling the lowest places without striving, and he serves. (上善若水。水善利万物而不争，处众人之所恶，故几于道) He facilitates the creative force, not just for the director but the whole cast and crew. He does his own stand-ins for lighting because, you know, this saves time. Instead of going to his trailer in between setups, he will stand around on set to watch people work. One time I asked him, “Why don’t you go rest?” He said, “I want to see how I can help.” I told him, “Don’t waste your energy, because I need you to shine on camera.” He said, “Chatting or gossip wastes Chi, reading makes my eyes lose their luster, and sleep is boring, so I watch people to see where I can help.”

There was another time he got to our cinematographer Rodrigo Prieto. We were staging a shot where Tony opens the door and looks in, and the camera pulled focus from the opening door to a close-up of his face. It was an extremely difficult shot to get right technically and with the sparkling performances. Rodrigo came up to me with tears in his eyes because Tony had asked him, “Where should I be?” He said, “I’ve had a long career and shot all around the world. Nobody ever asked me that question. People just don’t know how hard that shot is.” If that’s not a filmmaker’s dream, what is?

When you’re that talented and you have the natural look, that’s a gift. But to share it with kindness and to facilitate it in others, time and again, that’s a lifetime achievement. Being a great actor demands a love of the craft, and being a star requires you to function as inspiration for others, like a kind of modern royalty. Tony does both outstandingly well. He provokes our imagination that we can all dream through him. It’s a certain spirit I wish I could articulate and present to you, but I can’t because it’s beyond words.

I just feel so lucky to have been a small part of that magic, that bigger picture that we’re here to celebrate today. It is my great joy to present this Lifetime Achievement Award on the 80th birthday of the Venice Film Festival to Tony Leung.

And Tony Leung said,

“Ang, I know you will make me cry. Can you give me a minute? Thank you so much, Ang, for such lovely compliments, especially coming out from my most respected director and a very good friend of mine. And, uh, thank you, Venice International Film Festival. This is really a great honor.

First and foremost, I would love to express my gratitude to my dearest wife, Carina Lau, for her love and constant support, my family, my friends, and fans all over the world. I am so grateful to have been raised in Hong Kong as well as being nurtured later by the Hong Kong movie industry in general, where my acting career began. And I also want to share this honor and give thanks to all those wonderful people who I have worked with over the past 41 years because this is a tribute to them as well. And of course, to Hong Kong cinema. Thank you very much. Gracias.”

Mind

Mind

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Lessons at Tibet House have resumed and we started on Buddhist psychology yesterday

Geshe la mentioned the importance of knowing the mind which is a clear knowing with luminosity

And helped us find it

He reinforced the importance to not just know but to experience it feel it

Can you feel your mind even if you do not see it and even if the brain can be seen

Yet we experience our world because of the workings of the mind

Specifically the cravings of the mind

Here’s what is said by the great masters on mind

He brought to mind that everyday we have a personal practice to attend to

Having been born on earth- its a great opportunity and blessed to study and practice great wisdom of the masters

Say no to afflictions and bad habits

See what is obscuring your buddha nature for this is being kind to yourself in wisest way

We are all affected or under the influence of mental defilements and What is mental defilements?

-what is the nature of mental defilements?

Connected to self grasping ignorance Complimented by self centred attitude give rise to inappropriate attention gross afflictions and negative karma

Fear that arises within you is because of misconception 

If you want to get rid of this fear

Get rid of misconception by specific knowledge or wisdom

Introduce counter force directly opp wrt the object of apprehension

To Remove fear of samsara, 

Remove ignorance which leads to this fear which is self grasping ignorance

Past life habits of samsara deceives us in this life to think we r young

Know nature of mind or how mind works

We live in deep illusion

With this teaching I sought to apply it and ask myself what is the nature of the keloid

I put my hand on it. I thought of the scratching and asked myself what was it that I wanted

I wanted to get myself out of something I felt I couldn’t

Or I was in some kind of struggle and pain or fear that I (thought ) I could not articulate or handle

The itch- was telling me there’s something that needs to be done

Reminding me and helping me to release resolve to settle

In actual fact I really wanted peace of mind but in effect I cause only an amplification of the struggle of emotions I was in – if I kept scratching and reinforcing

So perhaps the remedy is the state of peace or assurance that I am safe and there is nothing wrong with a struggle

But first- awareness

The mind is chief and precedes all phenomena

Everything outside is all about the radiance / manifestation of the mind 

With internal luminosity you can see radiated world outside

How can I get closer to this clear knowing? With awareness.

Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy?

Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy?

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This is one of my favorite meditation or practice

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wsEFrCVED-g

Each time I do it I find myself releasing something inside

Who is hardest to forgive?

Maybe it’s us. Ourselves.

Embedded somewhere at some point this idea that we are not worth cherishing

And that is how and why we allow ourselves to be abused- by ourselves when we lock ourselves up in less than ideal states or repeating cycles

Try this link with Louise Hay and find that feeling – you have forgiven , you are forgiven