Tag: run

Inspirations From A Run (XIV)

Inspirations From A Run (XIV)

by yellownblac ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

I intended the practice to be a time to open up and receive guidance for the questions I have and for the healing I need

And as usual it was awesome

Learning to make time for myself is one of the best things I can/have done for myself

To make space, just to be with myself

And I came to know how blessed I am, looking at the times I ran the same route and have nothing on my mind

I saw an article by Cedric Grolet and he says that he is creative because he is free.

I love this

I look back at the times when there is nothing else hanging on my heart and I ran

Besides thanking the divine for the opportunity, I thank myself for opening up to this opportunity

And I ask the divine to bring me people things opportunities that serve me in my highest good and to land me in a better place- one that is of healthfulness, vitality, happiness, harmony, peace, creativity, freedom

If everything is energy, we are creating with our thoughts words heart energy.

Of late, I particularly enjoy a simple qigong movement where you feel the energy between both hands and move from left to right

As I was doing it, I felt like I was adjusting my life. Purposefully moving things about in my life, whether it be the health aspect or career, family .

There is no need to fix things or speak to anyone to change anything of I can mindfully move things about, and to feel peaceful with this

And there were so many times I felt goosebumps when I spoke to my cells- let’s open up and receive healing love and light from nature now , from these gifts of nature. Be open to it, to receive. To bask in this.

Om

Inspirations From A Run (XIII)

Inspirations From A Run (XIII)

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The intention was to find the answers I need to help me move forward.

Ever since I came back from my trip, I find my body slowing down, sometimes I felt like my coordination was up in slips

This gave me worries and fears. Anxiety built up and I went – as usual to search for answers.

Was it stress? What was I really worried about? What bothered me?

So I set this intention for the run today

And I heard these flost into my awareness

– Run deliberately. Breathe deliberately. Go about your life’s littlest things deliberately.

– You created all this, all these extra things with some form of discontent with the present, that present you have had. You wanted something else other than that,

Let’s just say you didn’t really put yourself in the now

My way of tackling an issue is asking why but that did not work for me. It always brought me into a whirlwind of unsettled emotions which confused and thwarted my balance. So I asked. And the answer came.

– what is the best thing you can do in this moment? Or this next moment ? What is the step you can work on. Just do that.

–release. I realize all worries fears doubts self criticism and judgments I have in my system ever since the beginning of time and

– the mind body connection is very real. I hesitated about my way forward and my body merely showed that to me because it was not apparent to me

– what was it that really bothered you? What was stopping you? I asked. Worries (again?) about the kids? My abilities? Actually- no.

It was not knowing exactly what or how I want to live my life.

The last few episodes of The King Land echoed to me.

Won’s mother came to his father and asked of him to let the child live as he wants. To live the life he wants. She said that when she erroneously left Won as a child, she thought that would be the way to protect him, but in that decision she gave up the opportunity to live the life she wanted

She asked Won’s father , “ and did you live the life you want?”

In the final episode, Sarang decides to leave the King Hotel in which she was a top performer. She breaks the news to Won on the same occasion he wants to propose to her. And he keeps the ring back knowing that to love is to allow, to let the other’s dream take priority before yours.

He only asks of her, “ promise that on this journey when you find it tough alone, call me and I will run over”

When Sarang was in confusion trying to decide, she confided in her grandmother

“I’m wondering if the work I do at the hotel is what I really want to do? This isn’t what I dreamed of. I know I should be thankful instead of complaining.“

“My baby has finally learned to grumble and whine. No matter how well known a restaurant is, it’s no use if it’s not to your liking. Who cares about the hotel? you only live once. You should do what you want to do. Don’t mind other people. And don’t hesitate either. Do everything you want to. If it isn’t the way you can take a detour. If you fall off a cliff you can climb back up again. You will be fine. I’m here for you so do whatever you want to do.”

her grandmother put things into perspective for her, “”

And the question that is begging: what IS the life I want? Did I live life the way I want?

I think the last few years had me searching—- I was asking a lot on the inside and that translated to exploring on the front outside. I picked up things here and there and tried things that echoed to me

But they are not exactly mine. Perhaps at most, I rubbed of them a little. I was inspired. I tried to emulate and embrace. But they didn’t last because it’s not me and I would always feel bad about not persevering.

And so, at this point in time, I am asked to find my way. To start living. To be me.

Knowing what you truly want- that is the highest position.

Inspirations From A Run (XII)

Inspirations From A Run (XII)

by yellownblac ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Still fascinated or having questions about the now.

So the practice follows the intention yesterday- to bring me to the now

And I was asking myself the question- what is in the now?

As I ran, the answers came.

Inspirations for my work. Questions I could ask newsmakers. Stories I could pitch. Things I can cook for lunch.

My mind was running everywhere in the now.

Then the wind came along. I used it to shower my body with the freshness it brought.

I asked it to cleanse me if the excessive energies and anything that no longer supports me.

I felt good with/ in the wind and that brought about feelings of gratitude. I thank my body for running with me, the divine for the opportunity and myself for showing up.

Running in the cool wind made me happy! Now brought me joy- if I am aware.

When I a bit lazy, I used the now to set the intention to plant this seed of healthfulness for my future.

And it appears to me- now is everything and anything. It’s emptiness but fullness or wholeness as well.

It’s where things are created and the future is paved.

Thank you for the practice opportunity!

Inspirations from a Run (X)

Inspirations from a Run (X)

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What if everything I believed was not ?

I was thinking of the cycles I went through. If this misery is an effect what is the cause?

The furthest one I could think of is that I did not do a proper understanding of the traumas I went through.

In simpler terms, I did not accept

That’s why I am having repercussions now- wanting me to do what I have not.

If so I have spent the time all this while in a dream- in my own reality. I have locked myself up to it’s confines. Do I still want this dream? My distorted reality and vision I built. And perpetuated.

There was a little spark I saw seeing this.

But during the run- this idea popped up: What if everything I believed was not ?

What if I had chosen another concept another idea?

What if I have chosen the path of acceptance and just let things be?

What if I believed I am healed totally ? Or there is nothing to be healed nothing to do?

The very fact that ai am running now is already a gift and opportunity.

To break out. To breakthrough. May we all have this penetrating ability and power to breakthrough.

To see the dream.

Leave the dream- wake up.

Inspirations From A Run (II)

Inspirations From A Run (II)

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It’s amazing how being in nature can be. It’s not just healing but feeling part of something bigger

(I) divinity

I was trying to contemplate again on the divine. A while ago, I remember I asked myself if I believed there is god or divine? And not just knowing but feeling god or the divine?

In the run this idea came again. The idea that if this intelligence is the very one that is making birds chirp and giving them their spectacular colours of green blue yellow, it must be the same one to make me sing with joy.

(II) In place

In the run I saw a little worm suspended in mid air held by such a fine almost next to nothing thread of a web.

If this isn’t divine what is?

And in that place it is in place. Even there hung in mid air.

And even now where I am, I am in place.

(III) no reason

The idea that there is no reason for me not to be happy popped into my head. The same goes for contentment, satisfaction.

With what I have where I am, is there any reason for me to not be content or joyful? But instead of feeling grateful I was always judging and looking at more, it was my expectations my wanting more that is creating unhappiness.

But while people are rushing for work, I am having the opportunity to be out in the sun to work for my physical and mental body, to hear these thoughts and to check myself.

Is there any reason I shouldn’t be happy ?

Walking/Running (x)

Walking/Running (x)

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Its been a while since I picked up running 3 times a week. Although each time the route is the same, the process is so different.

What has been different is that H has been coming for healing sessions , energy work and I learn things each time. During the first session, her pendulum wouldn’t move on top of my crown, with energy work, the pendulum always moves in a vibrant fashion . But in subsequent sessions, in the beginning, the movements were small. My vital points were always wanting of movements and energy.

It is no wonder I felt low down and out. Not in the flow not connected.

Thoughts in the night

I have been drifting in and out of sleep at night with thoughts, such as: I have been “managing the keloids ” for the past close to 10 years, is it not enough? Not enough scratching itching inflammation?

Enough already?

I asked myself- or my higher self asked me—- in the middle of the night.

Peeling of layers

Today I peeled off another layer about the keloids.

Whilst walking back after the run, I peeled off another layer. The most recent realisation saw me seeing how the keloids were a shield and a protection for me.

Today I asked why I needed the protection?

The question is: do i still need protection now? The next thing that came to me was that I actually have support layers around me, whether it be family, an essential oil community or healers and people I could reach out to.

I am no longer that little one that needs protection, or -layers of protection.

The next thing I saw was that- the keloids were a shield and protection I desperately put up- in the time I need. There were these moments in time when I could no longer take any more. It was like the waves of life were coming at me. And I must have felt like I needed to block these out, and in a bid to block out whatever that was coming – I could no longer care if it’s good for me or not—- I needed a shield of protection. I needed to hide behind this shield this protection.

Today I saw how used to”shielding/protecting” myself from life I have become accustomed to. The shield and protecting is already happening unconsciously running automatically. In the same measure, the same “reflex”action, this habitual action and mindset, I block myself out of all receiving. Of all good things of all life.

Blocking out has been my habitual act I have become so used to, it happens without thinking.

Surrender

Surrendering is easier said than done. That day when I ran, I tried to work on open awareness. Basically just be aware of everything and anything around you. I felt like there was content in the atmosphere and I just wanted to allow the self to be open to this. To let the divine take over.

Whilst running today, I tried to open myself up. To allow, and to open up and allow. How do you push or let your self be aside and let the divine take over?

What is the feeling of stepping aside? Of putting your ego away in everyday life, in relationships?

Yoga

So many meaningful things felt during the yoga session on Monday. Teacher said, “find a place space for your breath – where it hasn’t gone to in your body. “

At the end of the session, I felt myself in stillness, in that place, there isn’t much movement, and you don’t really want to move. And after I left the studio, I wanted to keep that stillness somewhat. Trying my utmost to not disturb that sensation.

What I like

I told H about how Kim Robinson sat me down and used lipstick on my lips and told me , “Yen you have the most beautiful lips.”

I teared up. For he rescued me in that time of need. And till now, I remembered that moment even if he might not remember me. In my work previously, I have had the honour and privilege of meeting with angels like him, it was as if divinity is speaking to me through them, cherishing me motivating me, energising me.

It is moments like these- I felt connected to the divine. And in the years I have stayed away from work, I kind of lost grip and slipped away from these precious connections.

Getting back to work

I asked bf for support if I was ever going back to work. And he asked me what that is. I described to him how he could leave home without a care and to be devoted to work. Even if the kids were not well, he does not even call back to check on them. And that is because I m holding the fort at home.

And he got it. I asked if he is ready to commit to holding space and the home like this for me, when I get out to work. And when I do, I will have no reservations. I have been storing energy in the past 3 years for me to fly when I get out there.

Reflection

Saw the moon walking back and I instantly and instinctively turned to find the sun, in the opposite direction. Like resonance.

See the moon and you know where the sun is. As in what we see in our lives everyday. As above, so below. As with in, so with out. As the universe, so the soul. ― Hermes Trismegistus

Running/ Walking (iv)

Running/ Walking (iv)

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I woke up hearing a thought say: isn’t this the best time of your life?

You have all the freedom to do / create what you want/like, with little to no responsibilities outside taking care of yourself and your family.

Now is the time.

Now- what do you want to do?

Use this time.

When I ran , I hear myself say the things I want to do

I want to fly and be on SQ with my family

I want to upgrade my physical abilities and capabilities.

I want to uplift myself. To a higher vibrational mode.

I ran the route I ran on my birthday and thought of the things I wrote.

I saw a young couple taking their wedding photos. Would you see the sun because of some who came into your life? What about me. I saw someone canoe

I saw a tree that went out of its way—- it grew horizontally instead of vertically? How and why? For whom or what? How did we grow?

The days ahead are a blank page waiting for me to fill.

And I will.