See You In My 19th Life

See You In My 19th Life

https://www.netflix.com/th-en/title/81671426

Chanced upon this new kpop drama at the time I picked up Buddhist studies at Tibet House

The teachings were profound and spoke of the law of cause and effect which governed the universe- and life

The teachings spoke of mental afflictions like attachments aversions and ignorance and how we keep ourselves in samsaric existence in the wheel of life

That was what the kpop drama is about

Ji Eum is in her 19th life and she remembers all the other lifetimes

Because of her attachments she couldn’t let go of, she actively courts the people who were dear to her in her last lifetime like Seo Ha whom she loves, like her sister Cho won whom she loves

When emotions got intense Ji Eum lets her truth out to Cho won and Seo Ha

But there was one dream that coming to her and that was something she had to piece together

Kang is another young man who provided the clue to this dream. He placed the shaman’s bells in Ji Eum’s room and she gets to go back to her first life

By and by she saw what happened, piecing things together bit by bit

She saw how Kang in her first life killed Cho won and herself , and how Seo ha protected her

Most of all she saw how she, in a fit of anger, in a crucial moment, vowed to remember this hatred and to come back

When she saw it was herself that bound herself to the past, she broke down.

It wasn’t anyone else who tied her down. While she was looking for the killer who killed her sister and herself, she realised that it was non other than herself who bonded herself to this lifetime, it was her who stopped herself from breaking away or breaking up

It was herself who cursed herself

“It was me. I bound myself to it. Because I was enraged.”

And who brought herself into existence over and over again

Wow

Wow

Wow

And the title to this final episode reads, “ the one who ties the knot has to untie it”

The drama used an analogy this way.

Her niece in her last lifetime is sick and Kang tells her there is a way to saving her

He seeks redemption and asks for forgiveness

And delivers the message that –

If and only if Ji Eum forgets everything and all memories fall apart and there is no trace of remembering anyone she is attached to

If she chooses this path, her niece would be saved. Conversely if she chooses to remember, Cho won and Seo ha whom she loves dearly will suffer the same fate

Ji Eum rationalizes over this and try as she might she does not want to forget

She asks, “ what can I share if I forget”

In her agony it was Seo ha who came to her and assures her that even if she does not recognize him, he will come to her

Ji Eum seems to have decided and went to her house in her previous lifetime

She hugs her mother who seems to know that Ji Eum is in fact her beloved daughter who has passed away and has come back- a promise her daughter made to her

Ji Eum finally went to the bridge in her first life where she was killed, shaman bells in her hand

And she met her in her first life and is asked how she feels

Ji Eum says she is happy

A carefree heart that is ready to forget everything

And four words- All is good now

And the drama shows that she is renewed and has no more memory of Seo ha and Cho won

Instead, the tides have changed and in turn Cho won and Seo ha now court her back

Ji Eum is a new piece of paper with the memories gone

I love how the story brings the theme of acceptance and making peace out

If we live and breathe without acceptance, we are essentially living the past in the now

Recycling attachments emotions and creating more afflictions and mental defilements to further lock ourselves- and our loved ones in samsara

So much pain misery and suffering

But even so – like how Ji Eum finds it hard to choose to forget

And rather hangs on in pain

The drama shows that there is a way out

And that if we forget – actually , if we choose to accept we can start off on a clean slate

Life is lighter and simpler

And this is exactly what the Buddhist teachings are proposing

That we all have the potential and freedom to choose at every moment in time

To steer ourselves away from mental afflictions and to go closer towards wisdom

It is in the sway of emotions that we hang on to something of the past. In this clinging and grasping, we hurt ourselves more than anyone else

I look at myself in inspection

I have been wanting to “get rid” of the past- by not looking at it, by not touching it

Thinking that this is the way out

But it is so wrong

Making peace with oneself is not like that

Making peace means a carefree open heart and a feeling of freedom

I wish this for everyone for all beings to experience this openness and freedom in one way or another, at one time or another

May all beings be well and happy.

I told bf about this show and how Ji Eum’s dilemma to forget reminds me of mom who told dad at her deathbed that she wants to come back to him again and be his wife

I said any kind of pain is disregarded in her love for she still wants to be with dad

And bf asked, “how do you know it is all painful to her? You do not know what they went thru together. It’s only your perspective you see but you do not know the full story “

Indeed, I saw only the painful bits and took that as the whole

My perspective led me to the reality of a pain

Bf’s question got me thinking- a lot of people said mom loved dad more , but what if she got the love of her life from dad? That is why she is so giving too

Whatever the case, bf’s question had the effect of piercing through a dream and to break it up

And I saw how my one sided incomplete perspective led me into a dream. Is my heart carefree enough to forget this everything that is?

I tried to say “All is good now”

Yes all is good now

And if you were to see this from a larger perspective, the lifetimes actually could happen in one . They just refer to the past that one cannot let go of and keeps recycling

Oh And let’s just say the ost is so very nice too

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mctjoaC68h0

The Sound Of Magic

The Sound Of Magic

It is interesting how I picked out dramas. They seem to deliver the things I need to keep me in perspective

Annarasumanara aka The Sound of Magic is a fantasy-music-psychological K-drama directed by Kim Seongyoon and written by Kim Minjeong. The show is based on Ha IIkwon’s webtoon of the same name, starring South Korean superstar Ji Changwook in the lead role, alongside Choi Sungeun and Hwang Inyeop.

Annarasumanara is a moving and inspiring story about growing up and being the person you want to be. It’s a beautiful message about seeking happiness through faith in one’s dreams.

Magic doesn’t create miracles

But allows you to discover them

How should we live life

A lot of adults give a lot of answers

How would an immature child answer that question?

Would that answer be wrong

Flowers don’t bloom on asphalt road but on bumpy dirt

I realised that I can’t become a magician that everyone in the world believes but I can at least become a magician for one person

You know I m going to keep trying to become a good adult that gives little miracles to people

The secrets of all that magic

If you just break out of the mould of the word destiny

There is a world just for you

Make your own fantasy

Spread your worn out hopes that you crumpled and put away

Sincerely sincerely

When I believe in myself l finally find out

That every second now is actually

Make your own melody

I went to hear your voice not anyone else

Sincerely sincerely

When I believe in myself l finally find out

That every second now is actually fantasy

33:32

Tale of the Nine Tailed

Tale of the Nine Tailed

Watched kdrama Tale of the Nine Tailed

And it was super!

From Wikipedia: The drama tells of Lee Yeon (Lee Dong-wook) -an over 1000-years-old Gumiho and once the guardian mountain spirit of Baekdudaegan -now a city dweller. He works with Taluipa(Kim Jung-nan)-an agent in the Afterlife Immigration Office and the protector of the Samdo river- to eradicate supernatural beings that threaten the mortal world. He lives in the city where he is assisted by his loyal subject, veterinarian, and fellow Gumiho, Goo Shin-Joo.

What keeps Lee Yeon living is his dream of becoming a mortal —- even if it means losing his superpowers and his eternal soul , even if it means in human form, you have to experience the cycles of illness pain death——-so that he can be with his first love, a human. But foxes cannot fall in love with humans and the connection was damned in the past.

The two reconnect in this life as lovers and the plot goes on to show their ill fated path that is to repeat.

It goes to show that attachments and energetic connections and the very strength of it makes people come back again and again. It shows that unresolved issues come back again.

But you can choose a new reality . Your choice of a new belief and making new choices or creating new pathways is what creates a new reality for you and your loved ones. ie. Yeon became a mortal in the end.

What is lovely of the drama is that it shows you how one creates their reality with their thoughts, fears, values, past experiences—- with their inner world. And that what we see on the outside are but reflections of what is going on in our insides.

It shows how in spit seconds we can be in another reality —- if we will.

The drama captures what we grapple with daily with our subconscious and consciousness and puts it in a storyline for us to find better resonance. And above all, it puts the power back in us. To tell us: We can and have all the power to create and recreate our reality in any moment so that we no longer are bound by the past .

Hometown Cha Cha Cha

Hometown Cha Cha Cha

Set in the seaside town of Gongjin, the story tells of Hong Du Sik, who has come back to Gongjin after spending 5 years in Seoul, carving out a career and facing the death of his good friend .

At his lowest, it was Gamri, and old granny who texted him when he was about to kill himself, who saved him. Unable to forgive himself for his friend’s death, he moved back to Gongjin and started out with life again, but hiding himself and his capabilities by doing odd jobs, living his life lesser than he is, contented with just helping out with meagre chores like catching anchovies and mending fish nets.

He meets Yoon Hye Jin, a dentist who has moved to Gongjin, and they fall in love. Not knowing that they have actually met more than once. The first time when she was a kid with her family, he tried to make her laugh when his grandfather was taking photos for her family.

Another time, she was angel who dialled for help when she saw his alone in patient clothes on a bridge.

When Dusik hid himself and refuses to acknowledge his feelings, thinking he is undeserving, Gamri said to him

“we all know you have had a tough time and we all appreciate how you go around helping people but go and live your life. Eat good food and be happy. Then you will be happy and your loved ones will be happy.”

In the last episode, Gamri wrote a letter to him when he find himself wrestling with his past.

Seeing what Granny wrote reminded me of myself, it made me think of the time i was in a wreck and how gor gor would prepare food for me and nurse me back to wellness and balance.

She said the same, that no matter what, eat I must.And i shouldn’t even skip a meal so that I have strength (to stand up back and go on.)

I was retrieved with the oats she cooked and the soups she warmed up for me every night.

And now I understood why, like granny, perhaps she felt that preparing food —and seeing that I ate well, was the only thing she could do for me.

And I ate them all and came back.

Navillera

Navillera

Navillera tells the story of Shim Deok-chul (Park In-hwan), a 70-year-old retired mailman who decides to pursue his life-long dream of learning ballet, something which he did not manage to do in his 70 years of life, first because his father objected , then when he had a family, he was struggling to make ends meet.

He meets Lee Chae-rok (Song Kang), a 23-year-old dancer who became interested in ballet after trying out different sports — and becomes his teacher.

The South China Morning Post states in their review of the series that “Navillera deals with relatable issues of old age, whether you’re the one approaching it or your loved ones are, but while the fear that a diagnosis like Alzheimer’s can cause is clearly evoked by the series, it steers clear of the day-to-day realities of the condition”.

There is a lot of crying to be done with this series. It calls out something at the very bottom of the heart, so sunken so heavy and we know very well it is there.

I picked some really beautiful quotes that resonated with me.

I just followed my emotions

My father who forbade me to dance is long gone. But i have not even danced.

I lived that way all my life and I am 70

I have never done anything I wanted in my life

I have been too busy making ends meet to support my family

Much less dream of it

And now I m finally trying to do what I want

I know I m old and weak but I want to try

I want to give it a shot at least

I want to soar again in my life

I would like to soar for once

I just did what I want to do

I always lived my life listening to what others wanted me to do

What brings you happiness?

This too will pass

It’s ok to fail

I don’t want to dance half heartedly

You work so hard

You will make it

Call him when you think of him. Run to him when you miss him

He is your father and you are his son

He must have been over the moon when you were born and smiled the biggest

Soar like an eagle

The sky is blue

I just happened to look up

And I felt happy

Happiness can be felt in the littlest of details

When you want something fr your heart. You shine brighter than anyone else

I can do and become anything I want

You can throw the ball however you want

I struggled this whole time and I will be struggling tomorrow as well ( referring to learning ballet and a gala show)

But I will still do my best

Just focus on what you have been practicing

The body will remember