I get tired so easily I wonder why

And when I get tired, there’s no way for me to hide. A nap helps me get into balance, but after a while, tired and fatigue set in.

I was asking myself why.

I was asking my body, what are you trying to tell me? Is my health not in good order? 

Not really.

Then?

I questioned when people got tired.

For example when you do sports. After that you might get tired. When you push and work hard for exams. After that you get tired.

I thought of the times I felt so tired.

There was a period in my life that I drag myself to work after mom passed on. I was so tired.  And all the times after I felt tired.

It came to my understanding that I am tired of what was in life at that phase.

I m tired of what I m doing now.

I asked Huaihao too.

And he said, it’s like when you get too much and little of something. It’s like you are bored.

He said that I look tired today and there’s not a lot of life in me . I asked him when was the last time he saw zest in me. He said when i had a job, there was so much life in me then.

I recalled how i moved in the time i was at michelin, everything happens in a snap and the word is energy and vitality.

I asked him what I could do to find that life and zest back to me. “Get some fun” he said. 

Wow.

Anyhow, I think it’s kind of the perfect time now is for me to come to this understanding.  

I used to read about how one could be out of sync. I guess that is me now.

After so long, I finally understand what the message tired is passing to me.

But equally, i am kind of satisfied that I finally found this out. According to Louise Hay, “Fatigue: Resistance, boredom. Lack of love for what one does.”