It’s been such a long time since I let this off. This running walking thing by myself —- with the sun.

And I can’t say how awesome it feels.

To take the sun in, in its entirety.

To breathe it into the body and cells.

And it dawned on me that yesterday really no longer matters.

In fact, I never really thought of how I could handle myself my life and the little things in there. I was at best, trudging along the times irregardless of how they were.

Except for some pockets when I really knew what I wanted – the clearest was when I got Nicholas Tse to be the “Friend of M” that was divine.

All other times I thought I knew but I don’t really.

It dawned upon me that I did not figure a way out of how I would manage the cyst the keloids the gums

I was always asking for advice and dishing out the responsibility of healing to someone else but me

And I asked myself, ” are you healthy now?”

The reply www a resounding yes! Yes yes YES YES YES!

So do I have to do something about it?

NO! There is NOTHING TO DO!

And there was more!

The inner knowing is that all these are energies . Energies that have been focused

And I asked, what do I do about them?

The first thing that came to mind was release. But is it really?

No.

So how do I live with this or manage ? How do I change the energies or the nature of what is there？

The inner knowing is to do things that make me happy like this – walking alone in the sun and a absorbing the beauty, soaking it up!

It is to do that which sparks joy and gives me that light that glow that twinkle in my eyes.

And when I do things that speak of joy, everything naturally flows and gets moved and changed.

Nothing needs to be done at all other than doing things that give me that light in my eyes.

And it follows: there is nothing to heal. NO THING to do.

THANK YOU!An

And to you you you you you you you out there, be happy. I wish you pure joy and happy moments. Be happy!

When we were in Chiangmai , my husband sometimes asked me to look out for the taxi plate because he couldn’t see clearly.

So I saw it for him. Sometimes I couldn’t see a number or something and asked him to.

It felt warm to me that somehow after going through so much, and we had so many fights that wanted us both to call it a stop——- we could be each other’s eyes.

And yesterday in a walk, he saw for me what I needed. And said to me as it is.

There was no sugar coating no harsh words just matter of factly and they were some of the most powerful words I needed to hear.

We always met uncle with his black and brown puppies at our walks, and uncle was exceptionally chatty. He was talking a flat in our vicinity that was sold for one million despite a 51 year lease.

Uncle said, “but all these 20 years I have been here, I didn’t even think of selling. all my friends are here, friends i knew since i was young, everyday come here to walk and meet with friends so happy. Happy and Healthy, these are the 2 most important things, when you don’t have this you have money also no use.”

Conversely, when you have these, you don’t need a lot of money, you are already happy! Healthy!

I was swinging my legs and arms as I heard uncle in the background. And when we started walking, I said to bf, but i feel like I don’t have those.

And it occured to me what and why, because i feel like.

But what IF: I FEEL LIKE I M HEALTHY AND HAPPY!

Bf let out a slew of his thoughts afterwards. He commented that I had been living my yesterday everyday, “when people say to live in the present, it seemed so easy but what is it?

Today you are walking and is healthy, but you choose to live yesterday. And is not happy. But you are healthy! You can walk and breathe this way, and when you walk like that you are creating a tomorrow that is healthy like this.

A lot of people missed the point that the body can do a lot of work and heal on its own. If you are not happy it doesn’t help but when you are happy and you do your little walk and things you like, the things you like is like that spark of light, follow it and more comes to you.”

I thought about the times I wrote about food and appreciated food so much, and more good food and lovely moments of appreciation came my way.

He added, “Maybe you are appreciative but its lesser than the feelings of not enough that you have.”

“Another thing, remember what Master Hsing Yun said? He had some illness of sorts , think he cant see or something, and he said, make friends with them. What does he actually mean?”

“You see, take for example Huaihao, his intelligence is what you adore and embrace. But his nasty times too. Can you embrace that? Or that busker who sang and so many came to listen to him, did you think he can sing those sentimental tunes and ballads being a good lover? Or Steve Jobs perhaps, he has these ways of seeing things that sometimes give people a hard time, but this , or these seemingly negative traits are what makes a person too. In fact, they are the very traits that make that person successful too.

It is what makes that busker sing and express so well. Now look at yourself—-the keloids cyst whatever, they are what makes you too, its not like you want to get rid of them “

“Its accepting them as who you are that makes you who you are. They ARE a part of you. They are the very things that MAKE you.”

Wow.

I take it that the divine is talking to me through my hubby.

And it means to me, things are speeding up and getting faster.

Of late, I been with the understanding that the keloids and cyst, have brought me many many things. I have gone on such a journey to understand how and why they came. To seek answers, and lots of things came out.

I know I am no longer at square one even if it feels like nothing on the outside has changed much.

But the feeling is different, the keloids have been healing faster and miraculously as I see it, and it shows to me how wonderful healer the body—my body and yours is—-because of the speed and beauty at which the healing occurs, its just a divine work of nature that no man can emulate or do at the slightest.

And bf reminded me once again how people forget about the miracles and the WORK the body does. It is just spectacular and always so in support of us—if we give it the right conditions.

And at this point, I have to thank my body for all the love support and healing it has given me all this while, never giving up. And in fact, always showing me its wonder divine nature.

Bf says, “follow that spark, if you think your friend’s mother is the spark, follow her, talk to her and see what comes out of it. Do more of what lights you up! And SEE what happens.

As for your body and issues, if it doesn’t bother you too much, let it be, let it be. You are alive, you are breathing, you can walk like this today, you are laying the groundwork for tomorrow.”

I shared with him a comment shared by a fellow lady who is in her 70s, and she said, “if a woman is healthy, her family receives bliss,”

Talking to my friend’s mother made me hear this comment again in my mind. My friend’s mother is so full of energy and vitality at her age, she draws me to her. I like talking to her and want to talk to her more. I want to find out her secret of how she lived, how she accepts, she is so ordinary yet so so so extraordinary. And all I feel like I can make a video of it and share it outwards to inspire people.

And that is what my husband or the divine said to me as well. OR the divine spelling it out for me through my friend’s mother.

I m so inspired she is like a model to me. I want to be like her!

And I WhatsApped my friend to tell her: You are so blessed!

And it made me realise my yearning for my mother. And to realise, how important a woman’s health is to a family, it really makes or breaks a family. That is it.

Bf said, “you don’t know what she went through but everyone only looks at the surface and the good things. Its just like some people may envy you but may not know what you have gone through and for that, I really take my hats off to the Dalai Lama, you have been there in Dharamsala to witness and hear for yourself his smile and his laughter, it is as if the exile and the difficulties never happened never touched him a single bit, how is it possible that he smiles this way?”

I haven’t felt so inspired to write in so long but talking to my friend’s mother and listening to my husband made me want to use today to create my tomorrow so that me and my family can be happy and healthy for a very loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time.

And definitely hearing this made me fall in love again. It was how we loved each other so much because we were walking and talking——- so much.

Nothing complex or high sounding here and in fact all so very easy to understand and achievable.

And i felt really light and happy after listening.

If this isn’t the divine, what? And the divine—is always with us, with me.

DO you hear it?

Try. You can/will hear this.