Papa, I am sorry but I had to admit that I was once so ashamed to be your daughter . I didn’t want to have anything to do with you then. Maybe you knew too because you apologized to me and us three.

The feeling of being ashamed of being my father’s daughter and more than that—-how it led me to become the person I m today popped up in a self reiki session yesterday

This was something huge

Perhaps I knew an inkling but the sheerness of how my life has been steered as a result of those feelings—— were gigantic and created upheavals in my system

It was so tumultuous my system couldn’t take it

I was confused, in denial, shocked, unhappy, disappointed with myself for having not been conscious —- and angry at the turn of events and at myself and at him

I couldn’t be “on” and kept wanting to shut down . I couldn’t lift my head

I felt fear in my heart

And these are the very reflection of my internal states

The feeling of being ashamed ——— has so much might it can destroy you

I tried very hard to bring this feeling to light and proactively manage it, first by feeling it in its whole

Not to be guilty or ashamed of this feeling but to acknowledge it own it honour it’s presence

It did come in a point in time and culminated in the person I m today

I own them fully!

It was hard work but today I felt it almost gone

Like another mountain scaled

I thought back about my own intentions of wanting to do inner work. I did.

And I thank the universe the creator the angels who have been with me in this process.

Thank you for the opportunity and the full spectrum of emotions unleashed released appreciated realized. They have always been with me all this while in my body my subconscious my consciousness but never did I experience them as fully as now

A few days ago I started intending this: I make the conscious decision to be and with the present.

It is a precious intention, reminder and affirmation

Onwards and forwards to awareness and shine!