Watched Its Okay To Be Not Okay in a flash. This Korean drama revolves around a psychiatric hospital and the stories of its patients, doctors and nurses.

The main characters are a pretty children’s novel writer and a male nurse. It is not the first time the two meet. Many at times, at a first meeting, we know if we have met before, earlier, in this lifetime or many lifetimes before.

Have you had this experience before? This knowing when you met someone and realised you had met way earlier?

The two ill fated lovers had their share of emotional suffering. The pretty novel writer witnessed her dad killing her mother. Her novel her stories she write for children had inklings of these.

The male nurse grew up with an autistic brother, his mother once said to him, that he was born to take care of his brother. He lived his life hedging on that belief thinking he’s had to give up on many other things, and his life’s purpose and everything would be to spin around his brother.

How many of you had a certain belief that was inked onto your spirit? When I watched the drama it appeared clear to me, how easy it is to see, that you are not born for a certain something or to live a certain way.

But why is it so that its so difficult to maintain this alertness when it comes to reflecting on ourselves?

How do we close this gap? What is stopping us from realising?

The story goes to show so many pains that is etched on to one’s memory, for example, the male nurse in his childhood, was so traumatised by having no childhood and having to take care of his older autistic brother, that one time, he ran away while the autistic brother was on the brink of drowning. The autistic older brother reveals in an incident he remembered his younger brother wanted him dead.

But who would know how the younger child suffered or how much he wanted or needed love as well, rather than having to care for an older brother. As it turns out, the responsibility of having to care for his older autistic brother gets heavier when their mother is murdered.

The autistic brother remembers seeing a mutated butterfly brooch on the murderer’s outfit and have since been haunted by the sight of butterflies.

As the story unfolds, the beautiful novel writer falls in love with the male nurse, and the three got so close to form a family, but there’s a twist to this plot.

The male nurse came to realise, his mother was killed by his lover’s mother, who turned out to be alive and have gone through plastic surgery —–and has disguised herself as a nurse in the psychiatric hospital.

Drama it may be, but it did bring out a ton of deeper inner issues for me to see.

I see myself and my insides, seeing these subtitles as the plot unfolds:

Episode 1

Memories of hurting others and being hurt

Memories of being abandoned

Only those with such memories buried in their hearts can become stronger more passionate and emotionally flexible 

And those can attain happiness 

Remember it and overcome it 

Or you will always be a kid whose soul never grows

Episode 2

Butterfly hug- cross your arms and hug yourself.

Self healing for trauma 

Meet trauma head on instead of hiding behind

When life is unbearable the easiest is to run—-so true, how many times did we do this

Episode 4

What does the child in you want

Episode 7

When you are sad, cry

When you are tired take a break 

I’m have been tied up for too long so I didn’t know how to set myself free

I cut off my leash

Episode 8 

If I give all my stuff to other people what will I have left

Episode 10

Try to think of your own happiness in stressful situations 

If you want others around you to be happy, think of your own happiness first 

Episode 14

It’s ok to be not ok

You see, you did nothing wrong

We did nothing wrong 

If you want to apologize for something you have to look with the person to say it

It’s rude to just say sorry without even looking at the person 

A kiss is better than a fight

Just accept it

Then you will feel more at ease 

Give me a hug

Pat me on the back

Episode 15

The one that torments you can also be the one that saves you

I’ll do everything I can to overcome and cope with what happened